plow

Jesus told a story about a farmer who went out and planted some seed.

i don't know much about farming today, but i've learned that the technique used during the time that Jesus told this story was to sow the seed and then plow the field. this would mix the seed into the soil where birds couldn't get to it so easily, pull up weeds and break up hard ground that had been trampled.


i used to think that it mattered what the soil was like when the seed fell.


but maybe it's more about what happens to the soil once the seed has fallen.

in the story that Jesus tells, the seed represents His Word. and the soil represents our hearts.
and the truth is, as much as we strive to be good soil all the time, we can all relate to each type of soil because we have all been there.
sometimes our hearts are hard, and His words are quickly forgotten.
sometimes our hearts are weary and burdened from the stresses in our lives.
sometimes our hearts are too full of other things to make room for His word.
and sometimes our hearts are soft and ready.

but maybe it doesn't matter what our hearts look like when we hear His Word. because like any seasoned farmer, once the seed has been sown He's going to plow through anyway. He's going to till the soil, move it around, break it up.

i feel like we can't always control the state of our hearts when we come to Him, life happens. and it seems like when we are the least ready to receive Truth is when we most need it.
but the beautiful thing is that it doesn't seem to matter.
He's going to give you a seed, Truth, His word, His life anyway.
but then He's going to want to plow.
He going to want to cut through that soil, mix it up, move it around...break it up.
tearing through barriers that have prevented anything from going deeper than the surface.
uprooting worries and fears.
digging up bitterness and anger you thought had been buried deep.
removing the things that have taken up to much of your time and devotion.
sounds painful.
and in my experience it usually is...
until...
that one seed, that one small portion of life grows and multiplies into abundant life.

so maybe there's no point asking 'what kind of soil are you?'
but rather 'will you let Him plow through?'

sunny

how would we pray if we believed that the answer would always be 'yes'? 
how many of our prayers would line up with our King's heart? with His dream?  

joshua asked for the sun to stop in the sky so they could win the battle. 
who's idea was that?! 
and what kind of courage did it take for him to ask that in front of Israel?  

maybe joshua was completely convinced of God's character. 
maybe joshua knew something about God's heart.  
maybe joshua really believed that the King was for them.  

but...does it really matter where the idea came from?  
the promise of victory was already there... 
did it really matter whether the victory came by hail storm or sunshine? 
i think maybe it did...  

joshua could have asked for another hail storm to finish them off. 
or he could have asked for the ground to swallow his enemies while they ran. 
but he asked for sunshine. for the chance to work with God, to be a part of what God was doing.


so...if we knew the answer would be yes, would we just ask for a quick fix?
or is it possible that His heart might be in more than the result?

space

space is important.

for example:
independence.
or
in dependence.

that space makes a world of difference.
i could live my life independent or i could live my life in dependence on someone or something.

sometimes space is healthy.
sometimes space is harmful.
but i guess it all depends on where i put that space.

heroes

it's a strange co-dependence.
light and dark.
or some might say that darkness is merely the absence of light.
or is light the absence of everything else? because what could be in the light without creating a shadow?

light and dark.
or let's call them Good and Evil. because that IS what we are really talking about here.

is good really about obedience, showing kindness and helping the poor?
or are these just good things that we do?
is evil really about lying, cheating and eating forbidden fruit?
or are these just evil things that we do?

should we be trying to avoid Darkness?
or should we be seeking the Light?

light and dark.
good and evil.
heroes and villains.

how do heroes become heroes?
does it really come down to a radio-active spider bite? or a genetic mutation? or the resources to build your own bat cave?!

or does it come down to their decision to be heroes.
because that's what heroes do. they choose to be heroes.

and that's why we love them. not because they are perfect, but because they are not and yet they choose to do the right thing. we don't love them because they come from the light, we love them because they have turned their backs on their own darkness.


but we love Christ because even though He came from the light, He entered the darkness.
He did not act in darkness but allowed darkness to act on Him.
and then He swallowed our darkness so that we might have the choice to live in the light.

before

He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake.
1 Peter 1:20

so...Father chose Christ to die for us because He knew He had to...
and then He created us anyway.
i wonder if God was always three? or if He became three when He decided to go beyond Himself and create the universe. i wonder if He saw the whole story unfold, realized there would need to be a judge, a sacrifice and a counselor and realized that He would need to be all three.
and when He dreamed of creation and realized that He would die for it,
i wonder if He hesitated.

i want to be known for love. not for loneliness.

i constantly face the incredible temptation to choose independence.
i'm actually tempted to choose loneliness.
because i can look ahead. and i see the potential for failure and heartbreak...
and it makes me hesitate.
it makes me think twice about really giving my heart to anyone or anything.

and that amazes me about Him.
and totally humiliates me.
how small are my fears and my suspicions compared to His certainties!
they are only a fraction of what He knew He would feel and only a fraction of the sacrifice He chose to make before He even spoke a word...
and yet Love could not be stopped.

He chose Love over loneliness, and paid for it with His life.
He is Love, and definitely not lonely.

cringe

what is it about suffering that scares us so much?
why do we feel a need to cover our weakness with pride?
what is it about death that causes us to avoid it at all costs?

and why is it that when someone speaks about suffering, weakness and death they are thought to be negative...discouraged...emo...??


count it a blessing when you endure trials and hardships...
in our weakness He is strong...
there is no greater love than this, that a man would lay down his life for a friend...


i've been reading some books that have me asking myself these questions.
am i afraid to suffer?
am i ashamed of my weakness?
do i avoid death?
why?

christians who refuse to look squarely into the suffering of Christ are not Christians at all. they are a breed of pretenders, who would turn their back on the cross, and shame His death. you cannot hold up the cross, nor drink of the cup without embracing the death. and you cannot understand love, unless you first die. ~ ted dekker


just some thoughts....i wonder what you think :)

splash

"God so loved the world He gave His only Son..."

but how much do i love the world?
what would i give so the world could know the love of Father?
what would i give so the world would have a chance to know His love, but with no guarantee that they would ever accept Him?


i don't think it's enough to only love Christ. it doesn't seem to have been enough for Father.
His love had to overflow somewhere...

in the beginning
of this overflow God created...
sky
wind
waves
seeds
dna
souls
us.

Agape love is to great to keep within one relationship.
it grows, expands, pours out and splashes over anyone standing near it.


this love is found in the difference between two families.
the first family had such great love for each other they decided to dedicate one night each week to "family time." on this night the phone was shut off, the televisions and computers were unplugged and the door was locked so the family could enjoy uninterrupted quality time together.
the second family also had great love for each other and decided to dedicate one night each week to "family time." on this night extra chairs were placed around the table, a large meal was cooked and the front doors and windows were flung open, inviting people in.
which family had more love?